Soundtrack

Independence Day Celebrations!

What a fun weekend we have had celebrating our country's independence (and it's not even over yet)! 

On Thursday night (July 3) Mark, Hamilton, and me went to the Cumming fireworks.  It was a fantastic time.  We got some good advice from Amber about where to park and where to sit for the best seats in watching the fireworks.  The fairgrounds were up and running with all the fun food (funnell cakes, ice cream, hot dogs, fresh-squeezed lemonade, etc.) and lots of people.  We ran into our good long-time friends Matt and Missy Payne and their daughters Hayden and Canaan and Kevin and Raelyn Walter and their children Hailey and Noah.  (You can see a picture of the youngest kiddos in Project 366).  Hamilton was such a trooper!  We didn't get home until 10:30 and he stayed awake the entire time.  He did great!  He really liked the fireworks too - didn't get scared at all and lasted almost the entire 20-25 minute firework show.  Luckily, it wasn't too hot and really made for such a fantastic evening and such a special memory for our sweet family of three!

Today we had the Thornton's and McLeod's over.  We took the kids to the pool and then cooked out for dinner.  We had a great time.  It was funny to hear the choir of cries when one got upset the others did too.  But it was also a great play-date as well!  Thanks for a fun 4th!

The ABC's of Me

So I first saw this on Shannon's blog, then Kristen's, and now Amber's (and a few other in b/t).  So I thought that I would go ahead and do it myself...so here it goes.

A is for age:
Will be 29 on August 11th.

B is for burger of choice:
Cheeseburger with ketchup and pickles only (no pink allowed in the meat).

C is for what kind of car you drive:
2003 gray Honda Accord, but am hoping for a mini-van sometime in the near future.

D is for your dog’s name:
Baylor - 4 year old yellow lab

E is for essential item you use everyday:
There are a lot of things, but I am unable to fall asleep without putting chapstick on so I guess that would make it essential.

F is for favorite TV show at the moment:
Tie b/t So You Think You Can Dance and sad-to-say, but The Bachelorette

G is for favorite game:
Marbles - it's a homemade-type game, can't buy it at the store.  It's a cross between Sorry and Chinese Checkers.

H is for Hometown:
Dallas, TX

I is for instruments you play:
I played the piano thru elementary and middle school and could maybe pull out chopsticks if I tried really hard!

J is for favorite juice:
I like the combo-juices like all-purpose fruit, or strawberry-apple, or white-grape-pear, etc.  But if I must have OJ there should not be a string to be found.

K is for whose butt you’d like to kick:
I honestly have NO IDEA!!

L is for last restaurant you ate at?
O'Charley's for lunch

M is for your favorite Muppet:
I don't know her name, but in my recent increase of seeing Sesame Street she is the little pink fairy that has cute puffy pigtails and carries a wand and usually zaps the wrong thing into a pumpkin and vice-versa.

N is for Number of Piercings:
4 - two in each ear.

O is for overnight hospital stays:
As a kid for a concussion after falling out of a wagon and having Hamilton.  I think that is all.

P is for people you were with today:
Mark and Hamilton like everyday :), Kimberly, Chris, and Mack McLeod for lunch,

Q is for what you do with your quiet time:
Blog, read, watch TV, play a game w/ Mark

R is for biggest regret:
I try not to live with regrets really.  A sorta stupid one is I wish in a silly way I would've pledge Chi-O instead of Kappa in college. 

S is for status:
Married to my best friend and who I respect the most in this world.

T is for time you woke up today:
8:30

U is for what you consider unique:
I have crooked pinky fingers and the biggest arches in both of my feet that make them even smaller than they already are.

V is for vegetable you love:
Green beans, carrots, squash, and zucchini.

W is for worst habit:
I know my husband would agree - my stacks and my post-it notes

X is for x-rays you’ve had:
A lot I'm sure.  The dentist since forever.  My wrist after my car accident.  My back most recently at the chiropractor.  I think that's all.

Y is for yummy food you ate today:
I'm hoping for a Bruester's two scoop dish of ice cream later today: Cake Batter and Strawberry Sorbet.  It's YUMMY!!

Z is for zodiac sign:
Leo

Home Again!

LATEST UPDATE:  It seems I may have my husband back!! YEAH!!  We went to the doctor on Friday morning (thank you Julie for watching H for us so I could go with him).  They took a second chest x-ray and it seems that the pneumonia is retreating.  She also said that he is in no way contagious anymore. As soon as we got home Mark just held and hugged H and even was able to feed him his lunch.  I also moved out of the guest room and back into our bedroom which was also a nice treat.  It's just nice to really have my family back again.  He still has a lack of energy - says it feels like when he had mono in high school, but as long as he takes it easy and still takes a nap during the day he is manageable.  This morning (as is common for my husband) he pushed himself a little too much.  He woke up with H, fed him breakfast, and took Baylor to the groomer and when he got home he was spent.  Nauseous and not doing well.  But once he sat down and ate some breakfast he was better.  He just told me, "I learned my lesson.", we'll see.  He is going to attempt going back to work next week, but may start off with half-days or working from home.  He only has 5 days left of his antibiotic which the doctor said was plenty to get him through.  Thanks so much for your prayers!!  We've hired a babysitter for this evening and are planning on going to see Wal-E and out to dinner.  Hopefully that won't be too much for him.  I updated Project 366.

UPDATE:  Mark is still feeling pretty crappy.  His fever started breaking tonight which allowed him some relief and enough time to get 2 pieces of toast down.  The doctor took a chest x-ray, blood-work, and a strep test.  The strep test was negative.  Quick review of the x-rays looked to possibly be early signs of pneumonia which would not be good, but the doctor told him he honestly didn't know what it was.  He has not thrown out something funky from Africa as well.  Mark has an appointment for Friday morning so the doctor and review his progress of an antibiotic he gave him as well as the results of the blood-work.  Two more guys from the trip have also come down sick - don't know if it is as bad as Mark, but they are ill. Anyway, still would appreciate your prayers.  He has spent most of the day lying down and is chancing a shower right now.  

Just a quick update to let you know that Mark is back home safe and sound, however VERY ill.  I just took his temperature and it was 102.9.  He's upstairs in bed and shivering with chills.  He's coughing and groaning.  It's so sad!! Please pray he gets better.  He is going to the doctor tomorrow morning.  He's also so sleep-deprived.  He slept maybe a total of 2 hours in the last 48 which doesn't help (not to mention just how worn out you feel after traveling 18 hours across the world, literally!!)  He of course feels that he should try to work tomorrow since his dad is out of town and he's the only one to run the business for the week.  We are also meeting the Greiner's and the McLeod's at the lake this weekend.  So there is just a lot that he was needing to do/looking forward to do that good health is required.  Please pray for my husband's health.

In the meantime, when I get some of his pictures I'll post some for you to enjoy.

Fun At The Pool...

Mom and I took Hamilton to our pool for the first time.  He did great and loved it!  He was so precious (as always) and even kept his hat on!!  Here are some pictures...1) He loved this little car float Joan bought him 2) We have no idea what he was doing, but it was cute and funny nonetheless 3) He really enjoyed 'swimming' with me  4) And when I stood him up on the step he just crawled out of the pool and up on the cement over to the pool chair and stood up  5) See Project 366 picture for cutest one of them all!!

Father's Day

We had a great Father's Day with Mark before he headed on his trip.  We went to church and then out for a late breakfast at Donut Connection.  When we got home we all took a nap which was very nice.  Then mom took care of Hamilton so we could go out for a nice dinner together before Mark left.  Mark wanted Longhorn Steakhouse so he got some steak and salmon and then we were off to the church.  He road with 4 other guys down to the airport.  We've been able to talk quickly a couple times since he left.  He was in London most of today and currently his plane has 2.5 hours left in the 11.5 hour flight to Cape Town.  I've been tracking his flight all night - he is currently over the Atlantic Ocean just west of Angola.  Here are some pictures mom took of us when we got home from church.  We were doing everything we could to get Hamilton to smile.  (Please excuse all pictures - Mark took his computer so I don't have editing capabilities).

Well...FRUSTRATION!!  For some reason Typepad is not letting me upload any of my pictures and I've tried everything this semi-techy knows to do.  Mark is now over Namibia and only has just less than 2 hours left in the plane.  So in the time Mark has been able to fly over  to a different African country, I have been able to upload 0 photos!  Sorry...maybe it will work better tomorrow.  (My whole point was to give you some pics to look at honey when you get to the hotel tomorrow.  Sorry babe!  We love and miss you dearly!!)

Okay well it's now 7:45 in the morning and I just got off the phone with Mark.  He made it safe and sound, however...the airlines have no idea where their bags are.  They are saying that they never left Atlanta and it could be Thursday before they get them.  So first prayer request...baggage!!  Otherwise everything is going well.  Mark's already sent me pictures.  I'll try to post one at the bottom and check Project 366!!

I know, I know...I'm sorry!

I stole this idea from Megan, but I have added a 'Project 366 Short-cut' section to the left.  (The actual Photo Album itself is now at the bottom of the page).  Just click on the latest page and it will take you directly to the most recent pictures.  Hopefully it will be more convenient for you.  Also, for those of you keep track...I'm at 656 comments.

Y'all are just going to have to give me a break until about Labor Day!  HA!!  Someone recently told me as much as they love Hamilton, they can only see that crawling video so many times.  Love ya Steph!  But in all honesty, I'm just a little overwhelmed with work stuff going on.  I think once I get through the transition to my new job and through my first GroupLink I'll be much better.  It's just a lot trying to do two jobs at once.  Not to mention my husband leaves for S. Africa on Sunday for 10 days.  When he gets back we are up at the lake house 3 weekends in a row and then my college roomies come in town for a fun reunion in hot-lanta.  Then it will be August and I'm full-fledge into GroupLink Mode.

So all of this to say if you don't hear back from me immediately on email, or if I don't check your blog (and/or comment) for a week, or if you call and I don't call back, or if I seem a little distant or un-clued in I beg for grace and forgiveness.  It's just one of those seasons in my life and I'm so excited for where it is leading and the end result once I pass thru.  (I would appreciate your prayers during this time as well as my potential replacement and this transition time in work).

So, along with this will be probably a lack of pictures (especially with Project 366).  But I thought that I would post as many as possible.  Last weekend we took our small group to the lake for the weekend for a bit of a 'retreat'.  It was such a great time.  I brought my camera, but then I forgot it on the boat.  So thank you Karin for donating me your pictures :).

This is MacKenzie, she will be 2 in October and did so great this weekend!!

The McLeods, Coibions, and us...just a floatin'

We went to T-60 - a restaurant on the lake where we got some Low-Country Boil.  This is the Ikerds.

And the beautiful Thornton family...

A few shout-outs:  in-laws - thank you for all your help this past week, I so appreciate it!, Kristen - congrats on baby girl Abby, Kents - couldn't be more excited!, Mom - I can't wait for you to get here on Saturday, Hamilton is so excited to spend the week with you, Megan - I miss you, Amber - so happy that Landon is AOK, I'll see you tomorrow, and really hope it all works out according to our plan :), Katie - yeah on your new place!, Mark - I'll miss you SO much, Hamilton - you not only make me smile, you make my soul smile, Baylor - I'm sorry I've been so hard on you lately, and God - thank you for sustaining me and for being my rock!

Crawling...ALL OVER!!

I just reloaded the video after compressing the file so I'm hoping that it doesn't take as long for you to view the video - sorry...lesson learned!!  I also reloaded the videos of him walking.  People - next time tell me when it's so slow.  I was losing my patience waiting for the videos to load and he's my son! :)

Was told today that Hamilton is going to have to be moved up in his WaumbaLand class next Sunday because he has become too mobile.  My baby is growing up...FAST...leaving his mommy and daddy in the dust!!  Here's a video I took (at Emmy's request) of him crawling. Project 366 has also been updated.

Zoo & Lake

I wrote this Wednesday evening, and just now had a chance to add the pictures - sorry for the delay...

So I'm closing in on the last hours of my last Wednesday at home.  Next week, I start working Wednesday's in my new roll (and keeping my Tuesdays and Thursdays in my current role).  I guess it's a good thing that I'm not having a lot of sad emotions (there are some, but not bunches), but a lot of excitement.  Reassuring me of a correct decision.

Thanks for all your exciting 'congratulatory' comments on the last post.  You'll be happy to know that he hasn't walked since!!  Gotta love my independent son - I have no idea who he gets that from.  But he is crawling - EVERYWHERE!!  I was working at the stove on dinner and had left Hamilton at his toys in the den.  I'm used to turning around and he have pulled himself up and standing somewhere and working on cruisin' around the room, but this time I turned around and he wasn't there.  Wasn't in the den AT ALL!!  I found him sitting in the entry way picking at the leaves of my ivy.  WOAH!  Watch out world, here comes Hamilton!!  (Better said, watch out Ashley, you 100% have a mobile child!!)

So last Friday Mark took the day off and we all went to the zoo together.  It was fun to see Hamilton's expression when he was able to see an animal.  It's hard to point something out to a 13-month old, but if the animal was close enough, big enough, and moved a lot it got his attention.  The weather was very nice - just breezy enough and we left just when the sun was coming out strong.  Here are some fun pictures:









We went to the petting zoo while we were there too and as you can see by the before and after - the goat was very excited about my boys!





Then this weekend, as you know, we went to the lake house.  Hamilton enjoyed his boat rides a lot more this summer (he was only 2-3 months old this time last year and didn't really grasp the 'coolness' factor).  He fussed a little when we put his life jacket on and didn't like the wind in his face at the beginning, but by the end of the ride he was a pro.  And the second trip out he almost welcomed the life jacket knowing that it meant another ride.  More pics:







And to close, he's now also saying "uh-oh", but not always at the right time and only after you say it.  It's precious - the uh part he says and the oh part he whispers.  I gotta get a new journal to start recording!!  His one year baby book is done.

Two HUGE milestones!!

First milestone - he now knows and recognizes a ball and says, "Ba" whenever he sees one. The second milestone, I'll let the videos say it all!

This is so cute - at the end he claps his hands for himself!

And here was one of his longest - he got up to 16 steps!!

And yes he officially started crawling the day before - go figure!! Sorry for the formatting mishaps - I have to do all of this in HTML which is totally foreign to me!!  The captions are actually for the video below, although they show up on the far right. 

Catching Up...

My parents came in town last weekend for Hamilton's Baby Dedication.  We also went to MarriedLife Live with our small group last Saturday evening.  And I updated Project 366 to the best of my ability.  Now that I am past my life-changing decision I have the capacity to think about taking pictures again.  It's pretty late so this will be more pictures then words (and I know I won't hear you complainin').

Saturday evening at the Coibion home for dinner before MarriedLife Live.  First, the boys (minus Hunter T.) left to right:  Jake C., Chris M., Travis I., Mark, and Eric K..

 

And the girls left to right:  Karin C., Ashley I., me, Julie K., Jill T., and Kimberly M.  (You can match up spouses via last initials if you would like).

Sunday was baby dedication.  It was such a special time and I'm so glad that my parents were able to come in town for the celebration.  The church did such an excellent job to put off a very sentimental and memorable event for the families.  There were 28 families represented.  We each got a round table to sit at with our families.  Lane (our campus director) spoke on Deut. 6 and then gave us some time to share our 'homework' with our tables.  We were asked to listen to a couple of special talks and in those they ask that you complete some homework.  I posted ours on the side - 'Values'.  Then they ask the family to pray for the child and the parents.  We asked our dads to pray.  Then the closed with a song.  Anyway...here are some pics of the event. (And yes if you are thinking deja vu of Easter outfits...you are correct!)

The fam:

Us and the Kudlas Klan (Brad, Angie, Aidan, Brenna, and Carsyn):

Almost all of us and almost all of the Castleberry fam (Amber, Ella Beth, and Landon):

Other than that the zoo is tomorrow and then we are off to the lake for Memorial Day weekend.  So I'll have plenty to post about next week.  Stay tuned!!

THE Decision!!

Well, I made my decision and am now free to share the news.  I received an offer Thursday and accepted Friday the Director of Assimilation position at Browns Bridge Community Church. 

The phone call with my current boss, Dan Stonaker, was the hardest phone call for me to make I think ever.  I have reported to him for 4 years and let me just tell you, I have the best boss EVER!!  I am so loyal to him and honestly think I would follow him anywhere.  However, I knew I had to make this decision not based off of my loyalty to him, but what I was excited about doing for my actual job.  Seriously, if I could take Dan with me I would.  Man, growing pains hurt!!  I have had a flow of emotion ranging from guilt in leaving him and putting him in the position of having to go through the hiring process and searching for someone new to fear of the unknown.  But overall, as you read before, I have a complete peace about the change.

So, what is this new position all about?  Well, I will be in charge of the GroupLink events at the church as well as the NEXT environment.  I will also now be who all the Assimilator volunteers report to (which is funny...Mark now reports to me officially!! HA!!)  It is technically full-time (we'll get benefits again! YEAH!) and I will be working T-R in the office (so adding a day to what I currently am working).  There is the same weekday program at BBCC as well so I will still get to take Hamilton with me which is great.

Anyway...that's all I really know right now.  I have to find my replacement before I am able to officially move to the new position (which my new boss, Justin Elam, is hoping that will be complete by July 1).  I may, starting June 1, add the Wednesday at BBCC to start training, but it's all still a work in progress.

So, thanks for all your prayers.  I'm so sad to leave Dan and my current position, however excitedly nervous about this new opportunity.

And I'm sorry for the delay in other pics and news.  My parents were in town this past weekend for Hamilton's Baby Dedication so I was a little busy.  Mark forgot to bring his computer home this evening which has all the pictures from the weekend.  So I'll try to post tomorrow night more family updates.

We are taking our first trip to the zoo with the Field Trip Club this Friday which I'm totally stoked about.  Can't wait to experience it with Hamilton!!

Park Fun and Mother's Day

The women's group I lead meets once a month for study and once a month for social time.  We were supposed to go to Central Park for a family picnic last Saturday, but it rained so we postponed to yesterday.  The Kudlas, Castleberry, and Jansen family had a wonderful time.  Here are some pictures.  I love Hamilton's face in his first swing push and slide ride - PURE JOY!!

 

Happy Mother's Day to all of you moms, grandmothers, soon-to-be moms, and future moms out there.  I had a great day thanks to my wonderful husband and precious son.  I got woken up with breakfast in bed (yummy home-made waffles) and then came downstairs with flowers and cards on the counter.  We went to church where we heard a stellar sermon from Andy.  We then went to lunch in Vickery Village at a new restaurant called Atkins Park Tavern.  It was really good!!  When we got home I did some laundry and prepared for the in-laws.  Joan and Keith came over for a yummy cook-out steak dinner.  It was a wonderful, relaxing day!!  Thank you Mark and Hamilton!!  Also updated Project 366.

This Was One Loooooong Week!

So if you have been wondering about my long absence you'll understand after hearing about this week. 

We had the DRIVE 08 conference at church.  It was AMAZING!!  Went up Sunday to help set up and then worked all day Monday thru Wednesday.  We also had our good friends Matt, Kelly, and their daughter Darcy in town that attended the conference.  (Matt and Kelly were both in our wedding).  It was so fun to see and hang out with them for what little time we were able (by the time we all got home and got the kiddos in bed there wasn't much energy left to really socialize).  2,300 people attended the conference (which represents over 600,000 adults and children that attend all of those churches that will ultimately be effected by what these church leaders learned and were inspired to do when they return to their home church).  If I remember correctly there was something like 30+ states represented and 20+ countries.  It was incredible.  It is so fun to be a part of a church that is making such an impact on other churches and ultimately the Kingdom!!  These type of events are just one of the many times that makes me feel so blessed to be a part of North Point Ministries.

However, to start off the conference the staff had to put life in perspective.  A couple months ago I asked for prayers for one of Mark's friends and my colleague, Michael Colwell.  He was battling Melanoma cancer.  Today was Michael's funeral.  He embraced his heavenly father Sunday, May 4 at 11:50 p.m.  So Andy (Stanley) asked the staff Monday morning to do the conference in the memory of MC.  The service was incredible today - a complete celebration of a life fully lived and only in our perspective cut short.  Below is a picture of the Colwell family taken at Easter - Michael, Jen, and his two boys Kaleb and Noah.  I ask that you pray for Jen and their boys as they start a new journey in life.  It has been a very emotional day and I really don't know how to put it into words currently.  All I know is that something like this makes me look at my husband and precious son in a whole new way.  We are not promised tomorrow, this I know to be true.  I don't understand, however I do not doubt.  This family will forever be on my heart and Michael's perspective and outlook on the situation will continue to inspire me.  (MC came to work 3 days after having brain surgery!!  I won't be calling in sick for a headache ever again.) 

I'll leave you with a story that Andy shared about Jen.  Andy had come to the hospital to be with Jen and they mostly sat in silence, besides a few stories that Jen would share every now and then.  The doctor came in to speak to Jen and Andy left the room.  When Jen came back out she told Andy that Michael was with his Savior, and she smiled...BIG!  Andy said he would never forget it, that it left a life-altering impression on him. 

God may I smile...BIG...through every blessing and circumstance you bring into my life.  You give and You take away.

(As a side note, if you read my previous entry about the Ruth/Esther study that brought me such clarity then you'll understand my emotions when I tell you that Michael wrote that study!)

Crystal Clear Clarity

Thank you for all of your prayers, emails, comments, and wisdom.  I appreciate it all.

Today during my quiet time I read through chapters 3-4 of Esther.  (I'm currently going through the Ruth/Esther Source study with my Ladies Link group - it's a free download...check it out here.  It's AMAZING!!).  So I felt exhausted and almost went upstairs to take a nap while Hamilton was down, but decided instead that Esther was really calling my name.  So I read through the chapters, read through the provided notes/commentary, and sat and answered the discussion questions.  Here are the questions:  (I'm tellin' ya - these studies are GREAT!  You should use one in your small group or personal study).

1. When you were younger, where did you think you would be at this point in your life?  How does that compare to where you are now?
2. How had Esther's circumstances changed in just these four short chapters?
3. As you look back on the steps that brought you to where you are now, how can you see God working in them?
4. Think about the position you're in, the relationships you have, and the talents, gifts, and resources available to you.  What do you think God might be doing?
5. What impact did Mordecai's words have on Esther (vv. 12-16)?  Why do you think Esther changed her mind and decided to leverage her unique position?
6. If God has led you to where you are "for such a time as this," what might you miss if you don't follow through on what he has called you to do?

Then it has a part for further study and had me read Proverbs 20:24 and 16:9.  (For those of you who know me my life verse since 8th grade has been Proverbs 16:9 so it was really neat to see how God incorporated it revealing his clarity to me).  With these verses the following "why" questions were asked:

• Why do you have that job?
• Why do you own your own company?
• Why are you the president of the home-owner's association?
• Why are you networked with those other home-school moms?
• Why do you live in that neighborhood?
• Why do you go to that school?
• Why have you been entrusted with the talents, gifts, and resources that you have?
• Why do you think God has you where you are?

Ultimately, If God has placed you where you are for a reason, what is he calling you to do?

Esther 4:14 NLT "If you keep quiet at a time like this, deliverance for the Jews will arise from some other place, but you and your relatives will die.  What's more, who can say but that you have been elevated to the palace for just such a time as this?"

So...I'm going to turn right!  I feel I have received my crystal clear clarity.

Background story:  When I was in 8th grade my class went to hear Zig Ziglar speak.  Afterward I walked up to him to thank him for his message.  He looked at me and said "I feel the Lord giving me a life verse for you young lady."  He then took out a business card, turned it over, and wrote Proverbs 16:9 on the back of it.  He handed it to me, smiled, and went on to the next person in the long line of kids.  I didn't really think much of it - I had no idea what Proverbs 16:9 said.  But when I went home I was curious so I looked it up, "In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps."  So I sorta embraced it and started putting the reference 'Prov. 16:9' underneath my name when I signed letters, etc.  So yesterday a friend of my sent an email 'God's Will' that referenced Proverbs 16:9.  And then I'm doing the study in Esther and there Proverbs 16:9 is again referenced.  It was like God was laying the verse in front of me saying, "What have I been teaching you all along since 8th grade through this verse?"  And then it just hit me, this was the purpose of Him giving Zig Ziglar (as strange as that is) the verse to give to me, so that 15+ years later it would be so clear to me what God's next step in this crazy life journey was for me.

How Do You Make A Decision?

So this isn't a normal post with fun pictures of Hamilton, this is more of me needing some opinions and using this as an outlet.  So if you think this will bore you, please feel free to skip reading and I'll try to post a 'fun' post possibly this weekend.

So I know I mentioned on here a bit ago how I was having a difficult time with a decision.  And I'm sorry to be vague, but I'm still not at a point where I can disclose the details of the decision.  I can tell you that I went further down the road towards one way.  However I feel like it has now brought me to the end of the road - a dead-end where I now have to decide to go left (which keeps me exactly where I am - no change) or right (which takes me to a new adventure) (going straight is no longer an option) if that makes any sense.  I guess my question is:  How do you make a decision whether to go left or right if you don't have 100% peace or a crystal clear answer of which direction is the correct way?

I've done the pros/cons list, I've spoken to multiple (10+) people, I've examined what my gut is telling me (which is unclear), prayed and pleaded for direction, and still I just don't know what the right way is.  Part is the fear of the unknown if I decide to go right and leaving the familiarity of what I'm used to and comfortable with.

And when I have my morning conversation with myself analyzing what my gut is telling me I still feel like I get two answers.  First:  Ashley this is not the time to rock the boat of the perfect situation I have provided for you.  Just continue on the path I have you on.  The changes it would bring are not what I desire for you. Second:  Ashley cast your fears aside and see this opportunity as it is - a blessing and gift from me.  I will take care of my child.  I have prepared you and you are ready for this change.

Honestly I have never been so torn and confused about something in my life.  So I ask you, how would you decide?  How did you make your decision if you have been in a similar situation?

My consistent prayer all along has been for crystal clear clarity.  I'm just trying to figure out if this is God's perfect timing. 

Good grief - have I just run you in circles making no sense at all?   Because I think I'm pretty dizzy!!

Short Update...

Found our heart doppler - YEAH!  It was in the cabinet with the coffeemaker and croc pot?  Go figure!  It was literally the last place I looked.

Updated Month-by-Month and Project 366 Albums for you to enjoy.

Mark is out mowing the lawn and we are having dinner with some new friends this evening.  Canceled his 1 year portraits that were to be this afternoon.  Thought the bubble pic was enough and since it is with his cups and actually on his birthday it was just too perfect.  We'll try again maybe at 18 or 24 months - he'll be walking and have a bit more of his personality/little boy in him.

Hope everyone has a great weekend!!

Family Pictures...

I wanted to share the link with you to our family pictures...

CLICK HERE

Let me know which are your favorites!

Did You Happen To Borrow...

our heart doppler?  Mark and I purchased a heart doppler when Hamilton was in womb and now it is no where to be found.  I was hoping to let a friend who is due in September borrow it for the remainder of her pregnancy and I can't find it...ANYWHERE!!

So this is the best place I know to contact all my friends - did we happen to loan it to you?

Also...a vague update for you...thank you for your prayers concerning my decision.  Mark and I have a peace about what we decided and are going forward.  We will just wait now to see if God continues to open or close the doors - either way it will be an answer to my prayer of seeking God's will in this situation. 

What Does A Cow Say?.....Moooooooo!!

Update:  Took Hamilton for his 1 yr. appointment Wednesday morning.  He weighed in at 19 lbs. 13 oz. (10%) and 29.5 inches (40%).  Still a healthy guy!
Also, this is more like a big shout-out request:  North Point is hosting a large conference 5/5-7.  We have some dear friends coming in town for the conference and they are looking for someone to babysit their 13-month old daughter Mon. evening, all day Tuesday, and Wed. morning.  Does anyone know someone who knows someone that might be willing and able.

One of my friends started something called 'Field Trip Club' (FTC for short) where monthly on a Friday morning/afternoon we go somewhere fun and different with our kiddos.  If any of you Atlanta moms want to join us let me know and I'll add you to the evite list.  (For those of you not in the Atlanta area consider starting your own FTC - it's lots of fun!!)  Here is the schedule for 2008:

March 14- Jumping at Catch Air in Cumming

April 18- A dairy farm tour at Cagle's Dairy Farm in Canton

May 23- The Atlanta Zoo in downtown Atlanta

June 13- Picnic and Games at Will's Park in Alpharetta

July 18-  The Georgia Aquarium in downtown Atlanta

August 15- Story time at Storyville Books in John's Creek

September 19- The Children's Art Museum in downtown Atlanta

October 17- Berry Patch Farms in Woodstock

November 14- Center for the Puppetry Arts in downtown Atlanta

December 12- A Christmas activity TBD

So as you can see by the schedule today we went to the Dairy Farm and Hamilton got to spend the afternoon with his friends Ella Beth and Mack.  They were all troopers and we had lots of fun.  Here are a few pictures from the morning.

Here is Hamilton checking out his new car-ride buddy.  (Mack is in Hamilton's old car seat and Hamilton is in his new big-boy car seat...still facing backward.  I just haven't decided if I'm okay with him facing forward yet - when 'they' all say backward is safer and this new car seat lets him face backward for another 10 lbs.)

We all commented on how we really felt like a mom after this adventure!

We took a hay ride and they had the herding dog go and herd the cows from the pasture and brought them towards the tractor.  We weren't expecting the cows to actually come up to the tractor, but as you can see they wanted a snack.  Look at the tongue on that cow!!

After the hayride they passed out fresh, cold, chocolate milk.  Hamilton took his first drink from a cup and enjoyed his first taste of chocolate milk!  This is the three kiddos right before we headed back to the cars.

And here is a fun video - I haven't posted a video in FOREVER!  We found something new that gets Hamilton cackling pretty good...enjoy your weekend everyone!!  (BTW: Comments are at 594...)

The BIG Day!

So yes I stressed out about nothing...the whole weekend was absolutely PERFECT!  My family came in town Thursday evening.  Friday the rain held off and we were able to take the family portraits (which look at the last post for a link to a sneak peek of the pictures).  Friday evening we decorated the kitchen and den with balloons and crate paper.  Saturday morning Hamilton was a perfect angel and had a perfect morning - long nap and all.  At 12:30 the party officially began - we all ate lunch catered with a Honeybaked Ham sandwich tray.  We then moved into the den to open presents.  He did okay, but really wasn't too interested in the wrapping paper.  Then we moved into cake mode.  He was enjoying pushing his fingers into the cake and then 'crazy aunt KT' as she has now been dubbed thought she would get the cake mode really started and slammed Hamilton's hand into the cake and wiped it on his head which then got icing in his eye.  Hamilton was a trooper though, he didn't cry, but we did go into panic mode to get it out of his eye.  Then he really started to enjoy himself, talking and smirking and enjoying all the attention. (So I guess thanks to KT after all!)  Afterward we took him upstairs for a bath and nap-time.  The adults continued the party by a quiz that I had made and then watching the video we have taken over the last year of Hamilton's life. It was just perfect - everything about it, having the ones that love Hamilton the most there at the party, all the details, etc. etc.  My precious son had the most perfect first birthday party.  Thank you Bubba, Emmy, Papa, Mimi, and Crazy Aunt KT for your generosity and amazing love you shed upon our son this weekend!!

Mark surprised me with a little gift just for me.  It was a WillowTree figure (which I collect) called Child of my Heart.  The inscription on it reads, "Child of the world, Into my heart you came - Bringing sun into my life, Making family our name."  The figure is a woman holding a toddler-sized child and he is resting his head on her shoulder.  It was so sweet and such a special gift to receive from Mark on this milestone day of our son's life.

I will say you truly don't understand just how big a milestone your child's (or any child's) first birthday really is in the life of a family until you experience it yourself.  So to all my friends out there - here's to really understanding now what you went through for the 1st birthday of your child, especially your first child.

So on to the pictures, right?  Well look at the album on the left titled 1st Birthday.  My mom is still in town - I don't want to waste too much time uploading pictures to the post and to the album.  So enjoy.  (I will post some more to the album when I get the pics from Katie and Mom's cameras).  And I updated Project 366 as well.  I missed some days, but I think I had a good excuse!

And, I'm requesting your prayers over a decision I'm currently wrestling with.  I am unable to share the details at this time, but once I've made the decision I will.  (Sorry to be so vague!)